On My G.R.I.N.D.

To put it bluntly, a lot of things have changed. Times are a lot different from how they were before.

Don’t get me wrong. There are things right now that are different that are good and for the better, and I’m forever grateful for those things. But there’s always those things that become transparent and disappear as time goes on.

Change. Distantness. Two things as of right now, I despise greatly.

So many questions are racing through my head everyday. “When did it get like this?” or “How did it end up like this?” or even “Why does it have to be this way?”.

When did it get so bad?

I’m a pretty big optimist when it comes to struggles and obstacles. I tell family and friends that in the end things will always work out and that everything will be okay.

But, when I tell it to myself, it gets harder to believe every day. Very hypocritical, I know.

I’ve always been that guy that’ll never settle for failure, to never give up when times are hard, to never just be okay with what or how things are suppose to be or meant to be, to always aim and strive higher and higher.

But lately, I feel like things can’t get better. And as much as I tell myself in time things will get better, its beginning to wear me out.

I’m stuck. Fuck.

secretsbest:

you run like

then you wait in the kitchen like

hehehe

janicexchung:

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

Amen

rachel-in-a-nutshell:

I find joy in my potential for betterment, and the ability to acheive it.

Dang, I forgot what a good nap felt like. Haven’t had one like that in a long time.