On My G.R.I.N.D.

Dancing outside in the cold air at night is such a great way to relieve some stress from all the studying. You know that feeling when you get refreshed, like taking in a big breath of fresh air? It feels so good. Thank God for dance.

Ex.

I still remember the day you left almost eight years ago. I still remember the yelling, the screaming, the actions that unfolded, and the words that were said. I still remember marching up to you with tears running down my face, nervous but furious, in an attempt to do the right thing.

To be honest, at that age, I thought it was the right thing to do. But I had to come to terms with it myself. I had no idea what was going on. Why were so many people hurt? Why did things go down the way they did? And at that age I thought to myself why, in a million years, did it have to happen to me? I didn’t understand, being so young and naive.

But now and for the longest time, I knew it was the right thing to do. I made it without you. I got my first job at the age of fourteen without you. I learned how to drive without you. I played numerous piano recitals without you sitting in the seats. I got both my 1st and 2nd degree black belts in taekwondo without you cheering for me. I learned how one should treat and take care of one’s family without you. I even got in college without you, even when you believe I could never make it. I learned what I wanted, who I wanted to be, and the kind of man I want to be without you. I survived without you. No, I learned to live without you.

Its all because of you that I’m here where I am today.

I despised you. I resented you. Hell, you can even say I hated you with all my heart for what you’ve done to my family and I. You were the epitome of what I never, ever wanted to become.

But no, that would be to easy. To hate and despise you.

The man I want to become doesn’t involve in taking that road. I learned a lot over these last eight years.

And despite everything you’ve done,

I forgive you, Minh.

I didn’t need you then, I don’t need you now, and I won’t ever need you again. Because I learned how to stand on my two feet by myself. And I don’t want to turn into a person full of hate, bitterness, and resentment. I know who I want to be.

I want to be me.

oxsma:

BBA w/BC One

I’ve been doing a lot of dancing these last few weeks. Its been very refreshing, getting back to one of the things in life that I truly love doing. I’ve been so busy with school that I haven’t gotten the chance to really dance. BBA has been pretty busy these last couple of weeks preparing for the 2011 Wayzgoose Festival. We got a new set, and we’re all ready to kill it on stage tomorrow. I’m proud of all my fellow members and I’m proud to be a part of such an awesome group of people. We’re definitely going to bring the hype tomorrow. And it makes me happy knowing that I’ve been doing one of the things I love to do so much in life these last couple of weeks.

Got to keep dancing alive, got to keep at it, got to keep on improving and got to get better. Let’s do work tomorrow, BBA.

I would say my first love was my ex-girlfriend in my last relationship. It went for almost two years, on and off a couple of times, but it didn’t end until about last August. We met when I was a junior and she was a sophomore transferring into my high school, and at the time we clicked and got to know each other a lot over the summer. When she started at my high school as a junior, we began our relationship then. The relationship was good while it lasted, but we had a lot kinks that came up within our relationship, and ultimately in the end it didn’t work out. At that time, I’ve never given myself to someone as much as I did in that relationship. But in the end we both went out separate ways and it was for the best. I learned a lot about myself, about love, and about what I really want in a relationship through it.

My first kiss was during the summer transitioning from a junior to a senior in high school. It was during yearbook camp. Quite unexpected to be honest, as I had no idea anything like that was going to happen coming in. I met a girl at yearbook camp, and at the time we really clicked at got to know each other over the few days away from home. On the last day, it…I guess you can say just happened. It was something that really stunned me for a while. But that was like…two and a half years ago? Dang, hella long time.

is theeee  bestest!

I think it would have to be the day I found out I got into UCI. I remember just sitting in my room, alone and coming to terms that I was going to attend Cal State Long Beach for college, when suddenly my Sidekick goes off saying I received an email from UCI Admissions. I opened it and was ecstatic. I ran outside to my mom and told her and we were both celebrating like there was no tomorrow. To my family and I, this admission to a UC was so important. It meant that everything we’ve worked for was finally paying off. I wanted to make my family proud, and I swear in that moment, I felt like I was on top of the world. That admission meant everything to me. I still remember it so clearly.